Saturday, February 26, 2011

DICHOTOMIES or in other words, WHAT?????

I have some questions about some things in America that are contradictory besides the obvious such as "we park on a driveway and drive on a parkway."

Why is it, if we think of something bad it happens almost immediately, and what we want to happen never happens? Oh, I did drop a jelly bread that landed jelly side UP once.

Why can't most Americans understand accents from the British Isles when the British actually speak English?

Then again, in Leap Year, Matthew Goode spoke with an Irish accent and Amy Adams--"Anna from Boston"--spoke with her Californian accent and didn't even try to put on a Boston accent?

Speaking of accents, what about those actors using foreign accents to simlate a foreign language? If they were really speaking their own languages would they have accents? Why couldn't they just talk normally and let us assume they're speaking in their own languages? (Or speak in that language and use subtitles? (More movies are doing that. And why don't Americans learn second languages? Spanish in elementary, French in mid-school, German in high-school, and a choice in college? Maybe I should mention British, but that's supposed to be English. (Oh yeah, I forgot, they invented English.)

Exception: In The Man in the Iron Mask it was refreshing to see the three musketeers played by John Malkovich who spoke with his Chicago accent, GĂ©rard Depardieu who spoke with his French accent and that other guy (Jeremy Irons) who had an English accent. The fourth musketeer d'Artagnan had a generic American accent (if there is such a thing.) It might have been embarrassing, but it was realistic. Bravo to the producer who allowed it. (Who knows? He might have given up. And if they were speaking in British accents, who would understand them?)

What's with a fourth musketeer in movie about the three musketeers anyway?

Why is it, too, that when you are married you have to fend off admirers, and when you're single and lonely there's nobody to be found?

Why is it when you're young you haven't got a clue about life and when you get wisdom and know how to use your brains you're too old to do anything with it? (Well, you can write blogs nobody reads.)

Why is it when you're young and start writing you don't have any experiences to write about and no writing knowledge, and when you're good at writing you can't remember which characters are which and what they said (or their eye color?) (I think it was Tony Hillerman who admitted he forgot a complete character.)

Why is it when you're working you have the money to do things and when you're not working you're broke? And when you're working you have plenty of time to do things, and when you're working you're too damn tired to do anything, let alone have time?

Why is it when you're young you don't appreciate your parents and when you realize they were pretty great they're dead? Same goes for your kids, not dead, but no longer sweet little babies you can lavish with love anymore?

What was that silly saying? "You don't miss the water til the river runs dry." Of course not. How can you "miss" something you still have? It should say, "You don't appreciate the water til the river runs dry." That must apply to everything.

How come you don't appreciate how thin you were when you first started thinking you were fat? When you're really get fat, oops, too late...

What's that saying, "You get what you deserve" only applies when something bad happens to you? To get good things you have to work hard and earn it?

I am so glad that when I order a ham and swiss sandwich with mayo on rye bread, I actually get ham and swiss with mayo on rye.

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m.m. said...

girl, the british didnt speak english, they spoke celtic and other britonic languages like welsh and irish, and then germanic peoples like vikings invaded and they brought with them old germanic languages that eventually became english.

Sandy Schairer said...

Thanks to m.m. for the comment. I think we're both right so what a dichotomy. I was given to understand that the present English are really "German" since Germanic tribes were the last invaders and stayed there. The Celts who were all over Europe way way back when were pushed back into Wales & Ireland eventually. I think the Scots were the descendents of Celts, Norse & the original tribes (i.e. the Picts who possibly gave rise to legends of leprechauns and elves. I'm not sure where the faeries figure in. LOL.) I claim poetic license in the serious matter of humor.