Thursday, January 06, 2011

Clothing Mistakes

Back in the 1950's when I was young, my mother told me that when she was young, bras had'nt been invented yet. (She was born in 1916.)

Then bras were invented. What were they thinking? And pointed? (And what's with the tiny waists to go with pointed breasts? Corsets deformed a woman's ribcage. That can't be natural or comfortable. Torture like bras.)

Since bras have been invented, and they've worn universally by American women, the rise in breast cancer has become epidemic. Breast feeding, the natural purpose of the breast has been gradually decreasing over the last 50 or 60 years.

When are modern American women going to stop putting looks ahead of common sense and their own health? The fashion emphasis on having large breasts has increased in the 1990's to the ridiculous practice of artificially enhancing them (thus making a woman into a plastic doll?)

And what the hell is a training bra? Do they train the girls to wear bras? Or do they train the breasts the stay under control?

I don't understand men that don't prefer a natural set of breasts that feel real (not to mention feel good) to a pair that look good in a bathing suit or a wet T-shirt. I should think women who look good naked are preferable to women who look better dressed up.

And by the way, when did looks become the test for quality and worth in people instead of integrity, kindness, and ability to give and receive love? (Not to mention common sense.)

I think the people that invented the bra should've been shot. Metaphorically of course. Bras are perhaps the most uncomfortable pieces of clothing except for certain types of shoes. Bras are a modern form of torture.

Bras make people breathe wrong. People are supposed to expand when they breathe not squeeze their rib cages in. It's unhealthy to breathe "backwards" for very long. Personally I would prefer not to restrict the flow of enough oxygen to the brain.

Think about it. How many women rush home from work and tear off their clothes first thing to put on something comfortable? They are instinctively trying to breathe again. It's to escape from the torture of the bra.

Personally, since I am retired and don't care about sticking out my boobs to impress people anymore, I prefer undershirts. They're warmer in the winter and cooler in the summer.

I sometimes wear sports bras but have a struggle getting into them. I found that stepping into them and pulling them up is way easier than pulling them over my head and trying to slide them down. (Try it.) The only other difficulty with sports bras is that they get rid of cleavage. They squish the breast together in such a way that has created a new word: "uniboob."

I will barely mention high heeled shoes and the craziness of the people that invented them. I understand that men wore them back in the 1700's when they strolled around like peacocks. (Only the rich guys since the peasants were lucky if they even had shoes.)

I wore heels for years, even to work in. My feet were used to them, even walking around on cement floors at the LVMPD Records Bureau where it often felt I was walking my feet into nubs. I assume at a certain point my feet went numb. In fact, there were days I worked the busy counter when my feet hurt all the way up to my knees. When they begin to hurt up to my shoulders, I had to quit that job.

But I knew when it was time to give up high heels. And pantyhose. Another form of torture. Heck, I am old enough to remember times before they were invented. Pantyhose, as uncomfortable as they are, are better than garter belts and stocking with seams. (Yeah, I'm that old. It was very distracting to try to keep the seams straight!)

I wear socks now, yes, even to church. I have some pretty red ones for Valentine's Day. And thick fuzzy ones for winter. And comfortable shoes.

Okay. What about short skirts & dresses? They were a marvel when I was a teenager and a cocktail waitress and didn't really have to do anything but be pretty. (Hey, I worked in a upscale night club and was married. So not THAT kind of cocktail waitress.)

Since pants are in style now all over the world, I can't even see a need for dresses anymore unless it's something formal like a wedding--your own. I have a few formal and casual dresses with hemlines down to my ankles, but rarely wear them. Mostly I wear them in the summer because they are uncomfortable in the winter with cold air blowing up the bottom. (Their bottom and mine.)

Days are over when I need to show off my legs. They were fantastic but I don't need to get high on being judged on my fantastic looks anymore.

I'm a great person, even in sports bras and socks.

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